Tuesday, December 02, 2008

If something sound too good to be true it usually is.

I felt I needed to write about this (as I spent a Shabbos with a very sick Jewish man he really does not belong in the Orthodox world but sadly this likely won't happen) as it really didn't shock me but this guy was really sick in the head yet he really believed he was an expert on women and worse yet he literally used the torah to promote his own inappropriate lifestyle to others. As is many time the case this guy acted like he was out to save the women from all the horrible men out there and of course since he just used women without feeling any responsibility he projected this to others.

Before i get into his issues since he showed me some of his ideas he wanted to write which really I thought were just to put down men to get women to buy his book (and he admitted he was writing this to women) he wants to wruite and I don't think it is right to throw other men under the pass on false or exaggerated misdeeds to benefit yourself that you think that will give you more of an opportunity with women while hurting other men and hurting gender relations in general. But anyway I got upset him in front of somebody else as he was still promoting this and it was while he was talking to a woman he told me when we got back to his place he was surprised the women didn't flip out as I was upset but was rational and obviously he thinks that at the drop of a hat a women will flip out and the way he said it was unbelievable to me as he acted as if women never see a person upset and even though I was upset I was pretty rational in what I was upset about. I mean come on. This man believed that women never see anyone upset and if they do see someone upset they will "flip out".

Anyway, this is what he told. He told me he has had relations before marriage and I really don't know how common that is but he believes for nonjews this is OK which I don't think it is and it is unhealthy for children and really not in the best interest of women to have one night stands. Even if a guy sees an attractive women a guy that has some sense of responsibility would not want to sleep with someone that could get the woman pregnant and they would not be able to be a father for the child. It is just irresponsible if you really care about being a father toward your children. It also is generally not healthy to sleep around and a decent guy if he knew a women was doing this and acting very loose to at least let her know that what she is doing could give her STD's and to tell her that for your own well being you shouldn't be doing this and you should use your attractiveness to find a good man.

Then he tells me that women don't have to get married and I ask him well if women don't then how are men suppose to and he is well the torah says so. Actually the torah in Jeremiah requires both men and women to get married and even if it was only talking about men in one case still women are placing stumbling block to men if they don't try to get married. Both sides have to make an honest attempt. This guy must know this and yet he doesn't care as all he cares about is telling women they can do what they want and of course this benefits this writer who also wants to do what he wants and have intercourse outside of marriage which of course in the end is not GOOD FOR WOMEN and no decent man would say this.

What takes the cake is though that this guy admits he doesn't also agree with everything that it says in the torah but to pander to women he takes a few parts of the talmud and if you ask him "well the torah says so." And then he wants to save the Jewish people and wants everyone to move to Israel but if we don't have marriage and children through marriage we can't survive and interestingly enough the passage in Jeremiah was telling Jews in exile this which of course he doesn't want to hear.

Deep down this guy was just a guy who really just wanted to have relations with women in casual situations and thinks that for nonjews this is OK which is very disgusting and harmful to a society to think this way and harmful to women as well. From my limited interaction I can see that he believed that women have almost ZERO emotional resources and just are easily manipulated all of them and when I hear him talk all he talks about is what a women looks like to an excessive degree.

Yet he loves to pretend to be some sort of protector of women which he is nothing of the sort and much of his put downs of men sad to say is a projection of what he is. Sadly our communities many time fall for con men like this but again if something sounds too good to be true it usually is and furthermore there are responsible me and there are irresponsible men. To give the worst case most men who go to prostitution houses usually have a high level of contempt for women that OK most men feel aroused by an attractive women in any situation but to just have it with a women that just casually has intercourse with any man and is puting herself with serious health risks no man that really cares about women would just do this for his own pleasure at a woman's expense. In addition it may not be good for his health either but either way to promote that most men give in to their most animal desires all the time is usually a man who is projecting his own out of control behavior to others.

The worst example though was when I wss reading this article by Newt Gingrich from a Jewish newspaper and I said you know he divroce his wife when she had cancer and went out with a younger aid and I thought that was disgusting and shows no moral charachter (and he can't be trusted) and this guy is like well I don't know the whole story (this was the case he didn't have a problem with which is pretty telling.)

And lastly he has issues with his own family and other people to a very large degree. His own brother is not allowed contact with his son by his ex and his responnse is he deserves it because he wasn't nice to him and said bad things about him (Even so a decent would still see the bigger picture that a child needs contact with his father as well even if he has issues with him and not have such harsh judgement on your own brother). He has spoken about beating up Rabbi's because they wronged him and beat him up once which OK but he seems to feel this way in even where there is more blame then just the Rabbi's. He has issues with his family in general. I have had issues myself with my family and Rabbi's but I realize there is a bigger picture to these problems and certain aspect our culture that need to change which would prevent any of these items from ever happening in the first place.

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